Purpose of Parenting

At church, a small group study was begun on a book entitled Parent Fuel by Barry St. Clair. We had the privilege of having him speak at our church a few weeks ago. It was an amazing time. Parenting is a difficult challenge. It is the one job in life that has no job description, no resources, no rule book or manual, and no pay check either. However, God did give us a lot of help in his Word.

As a parent, I need a purpose. Many parents probably don't sit down long enough to think about what their purpose is in raising their children. Some would say things such as, "to make them productive citizens", or "to raise them right", maybe your is to have them avoid the mistakes you made. What about this purpose from Deuteronomy 6:5-7-

"Love the Lord you God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. "

Is there a better or more straight forward parenting purpose?

If I love God with all that I am, won't everything else with my children (and my life) fall into place. It is not about teaching our children rules or certain behaviors or expectations. All this will lead to wandering and rebellion. It is about teaching them to serve the Lord and hear his voice, to have a heart that loves the Lord. This is a task that I cannot hardly grasp, let alone accomplish. However, God longs to accomplish it through me. I pray that I will grow in love with Him more and that my children do the same.

Grace

I have just finished a book the I would highly recommend called Room of Marvels by James Bryan Smith. It is a powerful book especially if you have suffered great loss or tragedy and are questioning God.

The thing I am reflecting on right now that the book help me focus on and sort out is Grace. I have to say growing up I was not taught much about grace. It was a word I heard a lot at church but I had no real understanding of. As I went through seminary and attended different churches, my view of grace started to grow. This is where I am with it now...

I think that because of our mortality we are far removed from understand the incredible separation we have from God. We, as humans, cannot even begin to grasp his complete holiness and righteousness. Because of that we cannot truly understand our own sinfulness. Yet in all of that to understand his plan to pay the price so we could one day enter into a relationship with such purity is all about grace. When I begin to understand more about that separation, I see more clearly the incredible work Jesus did on the cross. I also become more aware of my unconscious and conscious efforts to somehow earn my place in heaven, or on God's good side. How utterly ridiculous to think I had anything to do with my own salvation except to surrender when I heard God's call. Ever breath I take, every promise God has fulfilled in my life, every blessing from his hand is only because of grace. In light of God's great holiness, I deserve nothing, and yet he offers me a seat in heaven because of grace.

What drives this amazing grace? LOVE. There is no greater thing and no other reason than love. God created us to love us and to love him. When my service to God is driven out of love for him, rather than trying to earn or prove something, I am free. In the end there is only love, loving God and loving people. (I Corinthians 13, Mark 12;28-34)

I could go on about the implications of this amazing grace, and I probably will at a later date as I process the things this book brought to light. However, I would like to touch on just one facet of this for now. There is a teaching out there that there flies in the face of grace and leads to people believe false things, becoming disillusioned and angry. There is this belief in a sort of religious Karma, that if we do good and are religious, God will reward us with success and heaven. This leads us to feel that we have to or do control everything in our lives. What stress! Our lives though are best lived, when we surrender control to God. It is all about grace, we can't be good enough to get a perfect life on earth. Give God control of your life, and see how peaceful you will be in the midst of the mess.

The Will of God

To me, knowing God's will has always been an elusive thing, like trying to hold water in my hand. There are in life some things that the Bible speaks directly on, that are abundantly clear. We shouldn't murder or covet, etc. However, there are things that we must figure out for ourselves. I think God's does this so we know that we need him, so that we seek him and pursue a relationship with him. Which job to take, what house to buy, weather to buy a car now or later. All of these things are major decisions and yet to know God's will on them is difficult.

I have been seeking God's will in an area of my life for about a year now. It has been an arduous journey, a very personal struggle with fear and desire. I have sought God's face and a few months ago I would have said that I knew what God was directing me towards. Now, when it has not occurred like I thought, I am questioning God's will. The war in my head is constant. I desire for something that I finally surrendered to and now it is being held just out of reach. The tears come even now.

I have been in relationship with God long enough to know that his loving kindness is better than life, to know that he is holding me and crying also. And yet the plan he has is evading me. How do I continue to trust his hand when it seems to have changed so abruptly?

As of yet, I have no answers and no peace on the matter. I am waiting, hoping in some stillness I hear his whisper, singing to myself It is well with my soul.

When peace like a river, attendith my way. When sorrows like sea billows roll. Whatever my lot, thou has taught me to say, it is well with my soul.

My sin, Oh the bliss of that glorious day, my sin not in part but the whole, was nailed to the cross and I bear it no more. Praise the Lord, praise the Lord oh my soul!

It is well with my soul. It is well, it is well with my soul.

Speaking yet of God's will and yet of different situations around me I continue to struggle with the choices God makes for people's lives. I will not go into detail but a theory was presented to me the other day that I must reject. It was said that maybe God really isn't involved in the world anymore, that he is just letting the natural course of things occur. For a moment this makes sense and even makes me feel better. I think, well that is an answer for some of life's tragedy, but then it hits me, it would mean I would go through tragedies alone. I believe that the Bible is one hundred percent truth and it speaks clearly that God is all around and in control. Although that raises more questions than it answers, it bring peace and stability that is unmeasurable. As much as I seek understanding I seek more security, in my heavenly father whose love is deeper than the oceans.

Waging war

I was reading in my Bible this morning and started with some verses that our song leader read to us last Sunday in church. 2Corinthians 10:3-5.

"For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."

When I read the passage this morning I began to thinking of the wars I wage every day. These are inner wars, soul conflicts, personality issues. I wage war against my selfishness, my laziness, my gluttony, my anger. Then I began to think of the wars my children will have to wage, against bullies or childhood cruelty, against discrimination, against their faith. Then I read my sister's blog, http://www.nilphamaripath.blogspot.com, and realized that there are wars even greater than all these. Our society and world is beginning to build strongholds of tolerance, of equality, of universalism, of entitlement. All these things sound good but when aligned with the Bible they are faulty. True religious freedom is under attack. The governments of the world are "protecting" us from ourselves when really there are imprisoning us. I don't want to be misunderstood as an extremist but I will fight to teach my children, and anyone else willing to listen, Biblical truth.

I could go on with all of the issues out there that scare me. However, that is not my point here. The point for me is to become, and to raise, mighty warriors for God. I am well aware that in more than any other time in modern history, my children will face great persecutions and lies. They will need to be able to wage and win wars everyday of their lives. But what weapons will I give them? Hatred, harsh judgement, bigotry, fear, apathy. No! I will seek to empower them with the weapons Paul is talking about above. We have access to a weapon far greater than anything man will produce. We have the Holy Spirit. You see, the battle is really between satan and God, it is a battle for the souls of men. Satan uses humans to fight for him. But he doesn't understand that God in me, in my children, alive and active can throw down the powers of hell and death. We must fight with great amounts of prayer, with compassion for the lost, with a firm knowledge of the truth and a ready testimony of God's grace and power in our lives. Whether it's resisting a second piece of cake, or defending my right to homeschool my children, or standing up for real religious freedom, I must let God fight through me and I must be ready at all times.

My only fear is this, satan is winning on earth right now, and it is because of apathy. Christ-followers, be ready, don't be caught asleep, the battle belongs to the Lord-be sure whose side you are on.

The Lord says:

"I know your deeds, that you were neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! So because you are lukewarm (apathetic, not willing to stand for the truth-if I might add)-neither hot nor cold-I am about to spit you out of my mouth." Rev. 3:15-16