Mama's got a new car

Introducing my new car, Max. I have waited 12 years for a new car and I am very excited.

Hope Deferred

"Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life." -Proverbs 13:12

Waiting for heaven and a reunion there with my Savior, family and friends is for me a hope deferred. I have the hope, I could not survive without it, but the deferred part at times makes my heart sick. Right now is one of those times. The world makes me weary at times. Troubles, expectations, guilt, fear, accusations, illness and so on wear me down. Heaven calls to me, the King of heaven hears my pleas. He knows my name, he loves me and has promised to be with me until I do get to heaven.

What a day that will be, when my savior I shall see. What a day, glorious day, that will be!

Until then, a hope deferred is mine...

Friendship

God has blessed me with many friends over the years. Some have lasted for days, others years. Some friends, even though life events have made keeping in contact impossible, will last a lifetime. I am glad that true friendship lives in the heart. So in tribute to past and present friends who have touched me deeply, here are the qualities and blessing my friends have given me over the years, I pray to be as good a friend to all;

-Peace
-Love
-Joy
-Laughter
-Humility
-Faithfulness
-Kindness
-Patience
-Fun
-Honesty
-Encouragement
-Tears of joy and sadness, which both have their place
-Constructive criticism
-Precious memories
-Life
-Smiles
-Hugs
-Dependence on God
-Praise
-Self-esteem
-Thoughtfulness
-Strength
-Prayers

Of course my ultimate friend is Jesus. The Bible tells me that there is no greater love than a friend that would give his life for another. Jesus did that, not only for me but for the whole world. Jesus' friendship to me is everything listed above and so much more. He is my rock and my redeemer.

"How great the Father's love for us, how vast beyond all measure. That He would give His only son, to make a wretch His treasure."

Stumbling

A situation arose today that caused me to take a look at a verse that I had thought little of before.
"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God-" -1 Cor. 10:31-32

The first verse I have heard and thought of many times, the second part, not as much. Today I became aware of a situation in which I was causing someone to stumble. I do not know this person, and probably never will. However, that makes my actions, although completely unintentional, no less sinful. My heart is heavy in knowing that I so innocently cause such grief for a fellow sister in Christ. It matters not that I didn't wish this on her, it matters that I have cause great trouble in her soul. I wish to apologize, but never will be able to, she wouldn't accept it at this point anyway. So I cry out to God for forgiveness of my sin. I pray He will erase the damage I have caused. I pray I will be more mindful in the future of the affects my actions have not only on the people I know, but the ones around me that I don't.

In the same situation and yet on a somewhat different note (it's complicated), sin, even when left behind, still causes trouble years down the road. Choices made by this sister in Christ, only 3 or so years before, have caused deep insecurities and jealousy. I know first hand how sin, even when ended and forgiven, can have lasting affects on one's personality and relationships. Whether one sin or many, done in haste and selfishness (isn't all sin selfishness) can create lifetime ripples and affect people we don't even know. So this sister and I have unknowingly sinned against each other. However, I am so glad that through our mutual God, we will have forgiveness and spend eternity together worshipping our Lord. We shall see it clearly then, and only then.

Until then, I will have to move on, through a profound grief and sadness, ladened with many tears, to learn what God will have me learn. I must become more sensitive to His voice, His direction in my life. I must honor Him above all things, above all of my desires.